For it is Spotify Wrapped season, and I am only celebrating accordingly. What I listen to is none of your business, but I’m going to tell you anyway.

Mine is “Werewolf Bar Mitzvah,” from 30 Rock. We all have one song in our top 100 that raises some questions. He now sits in our Spotify Wrapped between Beyoncé and Ariana Grande. We have Dance Pop listed in our top music genres - when was the last time we even went dancing? Someone named Jason Stephenson is in our top artists because of our nightly listen to his sleep music. We are in our 30s, and one of our most-played songs this year is about a 17-year-old getting her driver’s license.

In reality, all of our Spotify Wrapped stats are humiliating, and posting about them is each of us at our most vulnerable. How many minutes did we listen? Was it a normal number? We cannot wait to see Spotify’s pretty little slides about our good and varied taste! And then our depraved truths are revealed. Photo-Illustration: by The Cut Photos: SpotifyĮvery year when Spotify comes out with its Wrapped hub - the interactive component of which was apparently developed by an intern - we all scramble to see which songs we devoured and which artists we played the most. How many minutes is a normal number of minutes?

View top spotify artists